~ Oscar Wilde on Kitten Huffing
'The orange ones fuck you up REAL good."
“In Soviet Russia, kittens huff you!”
~ Russian Reversal on Kitten Huffing
Kitten huffing is a controversial practice that has recently been growing as a popular alternative to street drugs. Despite a long history in Western culture, the practice remains largely taboo. Excessive huffing has been known to produce undesirable side effects, and kitten-related human fatalities. Even unapologetically frequent huffers caution against using more than two or three kittens per day.
The 'cupped hands approach', developed by the Marquess of Queensberry as a remedy for the pain of head injuries sustained while boxing, has come to be the dominant huffing technique in Europe and the Americas. Other techniques are generally avoided by all but expert huffers and even experts tend to avoid techniques involving rolled up dollar bills, as the kittens tend to clog. Kittens that have already been huffed are reffered to as "Depleted". Long-term storage or disposal of depleted kittens has posed a problem for some urban areas. Contrary to popular belief, however, depleted kittens are not permanently depleted, as the actual soul regenerates the protective layer which actually inspires euphoria every year, although the actual rate of regeneration veries from breed to bread.
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